you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
i think i have herpe
just one?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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