this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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