when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
