i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
wrigley field is MILF paradise
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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