Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
