If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Randomize
