JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize
