I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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