You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
