someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Found your dick twin last night
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
