Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize