I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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