Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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