apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
