oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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