Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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