Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
