I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Sorry about my life...
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
