Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
My life is pants optional.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
