DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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