best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
