My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Randomize
