Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
