I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize