nut hugger
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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