Don't make out with my wife yet
It's just like the Real World with babies
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
