PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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