awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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