You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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