you guys were way drunker than both of me
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize
