So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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