covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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