There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
