in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
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