we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
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