Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
