Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Randomize
