hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
