just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize