great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
