To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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