how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
