so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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