How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Randomize
