I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Two words: blizzard sex
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Randomize