I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
