I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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