playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
