I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
