Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
