if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
